Wednesday, October 28, 2015
The Ethical Slut / wiki
The authors define the term slut as "a person of any gender who has the courage to lead life according to the radical proposition that sex is nice and pleasure is good for you".
The term is reclaimed from its usual use as a pejorative and as a simple label for a promiscuous person. Instead, it is used to signify a person who is accepting of their enjoyment of sex and the pleasure of physical intimacy with others, and chooses to engage and accept these in an ethical and open way—rather than as cheating.
The Ethical Slut discusses how to live an active life with multiple concurrent sexual relationships in a fair and honest way. Discussion topics include how to deal with the practical difficulties and opportunities in finding and keeping partners, maintaining relationships with others, and strategies for personal growth.
It contains chapters discussing how consensual non-monogamy is handled in different subcultures such as the gay and lesbian communities, information on handling scheduling, jealousy, communication, conflict in relationships, and group sex.
the-answer-to-anger-aggression-is-patience / pema
The Buddhist teachings tell us that patience is the antidote to anger and aggression. When we feel aggression in all its many forms—resentment, bitterness, being very critical, complaining and so forth—we can apply the different practices we’ve been given and all the good advice we’ve heard and given to other people. But those often don’t seem to help us. That’s why this teaching about patience caught my interest a few years ago, because it’s so hard to know what to do when one feels anger and aggression.
http://www.lionsroar.com/the-answer-to-anger-aggression-is-patience/#
http://www.lionsroar.com/the-answer-to-anger-aggression-is-patience/#
Don't Be Jealous / Pema Chodron
"The first step is to see yourself jealous, see yourself frivolous, see yourself wallowing in self-pity. You think to yourself, "Well, what would Dr. Seuss do in this situation?" Instead of using it as ammunition against yourself, you can lighten up and realize it's the information that you need in order to keep your heart open. If everybody on the planet could experience seeing what they do with gentleness, everything would start to turn around very fast, even if we didn't get to the second difficulty.
DOING SOMETHING DIFFERENT. The second difficulty is to do something different. Even if you see what you do, can you then do something different? If you're jealous, can you snap your fingers and no longer be jealous? We all know it's more difficult than that. You're sitting there and your boyfriend is sitting across the room with somebody else having a really good time, and you're getting more jealous and furious by the minute. There's a little bird on your shoulder who says, "OK, here's your big chance. You could use this to wake up.
DOING SOMETHING DIFFERENT. The second difficulty is to do something different. Even if you see what you do, can you then do something different? If you're jealous, can you snap your fingers and no longer be jealous? We all know it's more difficult than that. You're sitting there and your boyfriend is sitting across the room with somebody else having a really good time, and you're getting more jealous and furious by the minute. There's a little bird on your shoulder who says, "OK, here's your big chance. You could use this to wake up.
And you say, "Forget it! He's really a creep. I want to be mad at him. He deserves my anger." Now the little bird is jumping up and down, saying, "Hey, hey, hey, hey' Don't you remember? Don't you remember?" You're saying, "I don't believe this stuff! I am right to be jealous, and he is horrible!" There you are. The little bird jumps to the other shoulder and pulls on your earlobe and says, "Come on, come on! Give yourself a break. Get to know this stuff. Drop the story line." "Forget it!" you say. Boy, are you stubborn.
That's what I find about myself. Even when we're given the methods for how to give ourselves a break, we are so stubborn. If think smoking is hard to give up, try giving up your habitual patterns. It leaves you with the same kind of queasy feeling that have when giving up any other addiction."
(From her book Start Where You Are)
(From her book Start Where You Are)
Friday, October 23, 2015
Is Monogamy Necessary? 10 Celebrity Couples Who Have Open Relationships
1. Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie
According to Angie, just because you’re open to being open doesn’t mean you have to. She has gone on record as saying;
2. Will Smith and Jada Pinkett Smith
Married for 18 years, whatever rules they have—it works for them! Pinkett-Smith has been quite open about the open nature of their marriage, saying;
According to Angie, just because you’re open to being open doesn’t mean you have to. She has gone on record as saying;
“I doubt that fidelity is absolutely essential for a relationship. Neither Brad nor I have ever claimed that living together means to be chained together. We make sure that we never restrict each other.”Hmmm, we think she’s pretty safe in the assumption that with that many kids to look after they probably don’t have too much time to act on it though!
2. Will Smith and Jada Pinkett Smith
Married for 18 years, whatever rules they have—it works for them! Pinkett-Smith has been quite open about the open nature of their marriage, saying;
“Here’s the deal… you’ve got to trust who you’re with. And at the end of the day, I’m not here to be anybody’s watcher. I’m not his watcher. He’s a grown man. Here’s what I trust — I trust that the man that Will is, is the man of integrity. So, he’s got all the freedom in the world. As long as Will can look himself in the mirror and be okay, I’m good.”http://popdust.com/2015/06/05/celebrity-open-relationship/#slide1
Sunday, October 4, 2015
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